25 Funny Fish Jokes

Everyone knows that anglers like to tell fish stories. But did you know they can tell fish jokes, too? Check out these 25 funny fishing jokes and then send us your funniest fishing jokes.


A book never written: “Saltwater Fishing” by Barry Cuda.

Submitted by Jacob S. , Tampa, Fla.

Max: What kind of music should you listen to while fishing?
Nick: Beats me.
Max: Something catchy!

Submitted by Max K. , Elizabethtown, Pa.

Matt: What do you get when you cross a fishing lure with a gym sock?
Rick: I don’t know. What?
Matt: A hook, line and stinker!

Submitted by Matthew K. , Omaha, Neb.

Daffynition: Fishing dock—A surgeon on vacation.

Submitted by Brendan G. , Omaha, Neb.

Little Eddy and his mom were digging for fishing bait in the garden. Uncovering a many-legged creature, Eddy proudly dangled it before his mom.

“No, honey, it won’t do for bait,” she said. “It’s not an earthworm.”

“It’s not?” Eddy asked, his eyes wide. “What planet is it from?”

Submitted by Chase B. , Carrollton, Ga.

Superboy: Why did Batman and Robin quit going fishing together?
Superman: Why?
Superboy: Because Robin ate all the worms!

Submitted by Keersten H. , Naperville, Ill.

Jack: Why didn’t Noah do much fishing on the ark?
Jill: Search me. Why?
Jack: He had only two worms.

Submitted by Joey M. , Akron, Ohio

Game warden: Didn’t you see the no-fishing sign, son?
Boy: I’m not fishing, sir. I’m teaching these worms how to swim!

Submitted by Josh Y. , Lake Forest, Ill.

Alex: What do you call a fish that won’t shut up?
Danielle: I’m stumped.
Alex: A big-mouthed bass!

Submitted by Alex S. , Racine, Wis.

Tom Swiftie: “Pass me the shellfish,” Tom said crabbily.

Submitted by Noah W. , Fremont, Calif.

A book never written: “How to Fish” by Will Ketchum.

Submitted by Jordan T. , Ozark, Ala.

Ben: Where do goldfish go on vacation?
Bob: Where?
Ben: Around the globe!

Submitted by Ben D. , San Luis Obispo, Calif.

Aaron: How do fish get from place to place while playing golf?
Pee Wee: I don’t know. How?
Aaron: By golf carp!

Submitted by Aaron C. , Fayetteville, N.C.

Jaylun: Why do fish swim in schools?
Ray: I don’t know.
Jaylun: Because they can’t walk!

Submitted by Jaylun R. , Greensboro, N.C.

Allen: Why is it so easy to weigh fish?
Neal: I don’t know. Why?
Allen: Because they have their own scales!

Submitted by Ashwin B. , Morris Plains, N.J.

Mark: Where do fish keep their money?
Kevin: Where?
Mark: In a riverbank.

Submitted by Tony L. , Spokane, Wash.

Thomas: How do you communicate with a fish?
Russ: I don’t know.
Thomas: Drop it a line!

Submitted by Thomas H. , Annapolis, Md.

A monastery is in financial trouble, so it goes into the fish-and-chips business to raise money. One night a customer knocks on its door. A monk answers. The customer asks, “Are you the fish friar?”

“No,” he replies. “I’m the chip monk.”

Submitted by Max H. , Clearwater, Fla.

Maurice: Where does a fisherman go to get his hair cut?
Denise: Where?
Maurice: The bobber shop.

Submitted by Maurice P. , Hesston, Kan.

Ben: What’s a fish’s favorite musical instrument?
Morgan: What?
Ben: A bass drum.

Submitted by Ben T. , Olney, Ill.

Tom Swiftie: “Help me reel in this fish!” Tom wailed.

Submitted by Sean K. , Salem, N.H.

Diner: Waiter, waiter, what’s wrong with this fish?
Waiter: Long time no sea, sir.

Submitted by Jerry L. , Dublin, Ohio.

John: What is a fish’s favorite show?
Don: What?
John: “Name That Tuna.”

Submitted by John D. , San Antonio, Tex.

Tom: What does every fisherman want?
Terry: What?
Tom: A gillfriend.

Submitted by Tommy Lee S. , Warren, Pa.

A.J.: Did you hear about the fight at the seafood restaurant?
Nico: No, what happened?
A.J.: Two fish got battered!

Submitted by A.J. G. , Aransas Pass, Tex.


  1. UGABUG:What do you call a fish that has a sun burn?
    Joe: I don`t now.
    A sun fish!
    Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

  2. i like the monestary one i told it to my granfather who is a preacher while he was in africa by email and he said eyrey one laughed out loud when he told it to them

  3. Why don’t clams ever share with the other fish?

    Because they’re shellfish!

    *can use lobster or a shellfish other than clam

  4. Boy: Hey dad want do you call a bossy bass
    Dad: I don’t know son want so you call it
    Boy: Bassy

  5. Game warden: Didn’t you see the no-fishing sign, son?
    Boy: I’m not fishing, sir. I’m teaching these worms how to swim!
    Game warden: You got a fine, naked swimming is not allowed there.

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